charlie and his horse.

They will strike you like lightning when you least expect it, for example–3 am.  Why do preggo women get charlie horses?  Do people think we can actually quickly leap out of bed in the wee hours of the night to relieve the pain?  The only reason we will ever get out of bed at 3 am in any sort of hurry, is to pee…or in my case, to grab a heaping spoonful of Nutella.  I asked my doc why I’m getting them so bad in the night…and only on my left hamstring.  She told me it’s typically your body’s way of telling you that it needs more potassium.  STILL NOT GETTING IT since I eat a banana almost every day in a smoothie.  O.J. has loads of potassium too, and Penelope and I love our juice in the morning!

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so easy: 1 banana, handful of frozen blueberries, 5-6 frozen strawberries (we use frozen berries so we don’t need to add ice!), handful of kale, fill blender about 2 inches high with OJ, a Stonyfield organic yogurt (any flavor), and a little splash of organic maple syrup. So good, even your toddler will say “mmmmmm”

Want to know what’s even more fabulous? A CHARLIE HORSE IN YOUR GROIN. Whhhhhhyyyyyyyy would a body do that to a preggo?  Those are especially attractive when you’re at your friends baby shower, chasing your maniac toddler who has now taken 4 cupcakes off the dessert table, and you’re brought almost to the ground by a groin charlie horse.  It’s like a TIGHT pinch in your groin that simply stops you in your tracks and drops your bodacious body to a squatting ballet position.  Next, you grab your crotch like Michael Jackson and make a hideous face while screeching “OW!”  Some people say it’s the positioning of the baby–I say, it’s another annoying thing to add to my list of pregnancy complaints.  My poor husband feels like this list is a freakin’ never ending novel.  He actually will ask me “what’s the issue today?”–and when the answer isn’t something he’s been doing to annoy me, he MAY listen for the latest preggo problem…but chances are..he’ll give the head nod–and say “oh jeez” like he gives a hoot. HA. Love him, though.

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trying so hard to be gentle but can’t resist a little attempt to scratch me on the way down the belly.

I thought the baby was breech, because the kicks were so low this time around, but he’s head down and ready to go. (Even though he will be surgically removed since his sister was a 10 lb 4 oz behemoth and MAMA AIN’T GOIN’ DOWN THAT ROAD AGAIN) We will let this guy marinate for as long as he’d like knowing happily, that I won’t be pushing out a baby dinosaur again in 5 weeks. Call me COOKOO but i actually scheduled my c-section for 4/19 which technically makes me one day late! My doc told me she’d be on call that day at the hospital and it falls on my late grandfather’s birthday–I just couldn’t pass it up! Besides, Penelope was 8 days late, so this will be a breeze. I hit the 35 week mark on Saturday, and started needing a MEDIUM iced crazy mocha caramel-nut, milk, no sugar, iced coffee–instead of a small.  Judge me all you want, but IT IS a necessity if you’d like me to stay awake to watch Penelope all day. “They” say that 1-2 cups of coffee a day is perfectly safe–but when you think about ‘how I get’ my Sip N’ Dip (exclusively amazing coffee of Rhode Island’s East Bay) it’s a joke!  They fill the cup with half hot chocolate, ice, add the milk and top it off with coffee, it probably comes out to a half of a cup at most… and IT’S A LIFESAVER at the moment.  It motivates me to get things done and not beat my child. Just kidding. Let’s get one thing straight–she does the beatings around here.  Daily!–and not in a gentle way.  She is currently squatting on the couch trying to sit on the keyboard while I type, telling me that I’m “all done”, while ROUGHLY patting me on the top of the head. So sweet, my girl.

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…you just can’t escape the fishy kiss.

She just learned how to do the “fishy kiss face” and it’s pretty funny.  She sucks in her cheeks and puckers her lips–coming at you with force to give her a smooch. She calls it “Pishy kishes”. She amazes me lately with her wit and smart little attitude.  No word of a lie, I told her she couldn’t have a ‘treat’ the other day–because her darn teeth are going to fall out soon with all the sweets and treats she gets–and she threw herself on the floor in a dramatic fashion, of course.  I let her settle for a sec, and moments later, she shows me her backpack she “packed” (with her ‘run-away’ survival kit) that included maracas, a wooden spoon, a sesame street cell phone, a pretend milk carton, two bouncy balls, a fake orange from her kitchen, and cookie crumbs from the day  before.  I said to her, “Are you mad at Mama? Do you want Mommy to go away?” and she replied “Go a-way” (not that she has any clue what it meant).  Then I picked her up and said “If Mommy goes away, where will you go?”–and just like that she grabbed her bag, popped up with a smile and said, “Nonnie’s house!” (she clearly DOES know the meaning of “go away”)–and walked toward the front door.  Like, really child?! You are 23 months old and already threatening me to go to your grandmother’s when I don’t give you fruit snacks at 7:42 am… WE. ARE. IN. FOR. IT.

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all you need to survive being a toddler on the streets.

check out the “Do it YO-self” category for our ‘impromptu’ bathroom overhaul plan…and “Penelope’s Corner of Mischief” for some new pics..I even added some ‘unecessary info’ for you in “Pregnancy TMI’s”…enjoy!!

 Read below for a fun night out!

CALLING ALL MOMS!  NEED A NIGHT OUT? 10 of you can receive a FREE ADMISSION to an “Ultimate Mom’s Night Out!” Use the code DRAMA for your free admission when you register to attend on the website below! (NOTE: A $5 donation will be taken at the door, and goes to Horizon for Homeless —but you are saving $15 with the code, because admission is $20 per person without it!) Register ahead of time to be eligible for additional free gifts/gift cards to local vendors. I was invited by a fellow blogger, Melanie Gigante–with MommyBitesBoston, who is hosting it! I have never been to the event–but I’m looking forward to it!

http://mommybites.com/boston/ultimate-moms-night-out/

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Who: All moms and moms-to-be! Forward this invitation to your friends (parents of babies, toddlers, & school aged children)  Where: Arts at the Armory, 191 Highland Ave, Somerville, MA  Why: To mingle, unwind, eat/drink, meet moms, experts and learn about local mom products & services and get your laugh on…and get inspired!  Why not? Why not eat, drink & be merry in the company of other supportive & sassy local moms? Moms, let’s honor all that we do with a fun and festive night out just for us!  When: Thursday, March 26th, 2015, 6:30 PM  Cost: $20 ($5 from each ticket purchased will be donated to Horizons for Homeless Children). Includes gift bag, food, drink & entertainment.

Live entertainment, comedy, beer, wine, mocktails, gift bags, raffles, and more!!

Be sure to follow @MommyBitesBos on Twitter, and tweet using #UltimateMomBos

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